Happy Sad Birthday

and we swam
in the red cups
filled with
soda

we swam so deep
bubbles fizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzed up
to our ears

my older sister
chewslapping bubble gum
AND i couldn't hear
her chewslaps

unfamiliar family running
tumbling
eating
wah wah wah-ing
the numbing sound imbues

and birthday boy lays on a big brown couch

with no friends to talk to

with no happy

just birthday

and cousinslike flies surrounding his once empty room, now full,
still empty, a red cup with no soda, a white paper plate with no rice nor adobo nor macaroni salad

i despise macaroni salad

macaroni salad fiends need a smoke
or two
three
ten
eleven
i
cant
stop
smoking
i
need
to
party
and
get
fucked
up
because
im
stupid

or just lazyliketheweedsinmyneverendingsoulfulabysslyingonagrave-ishbrowncouch

happy 18TH birthday.


(what have you done to make your life better?)
-------------------------------
(what is written here is based on an actual event NutMeg foresaw at a recent family birthday gathering for her cousin)